Part 105: Memory of a Lifetime
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content warning: suicide mention
BGM: Silence
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We leave the park around half an hour before its gates close. Miharu comes back to Lion House with me to pick up her stuff. She left it all so she wouldn't have to drag it around the park. Divine Selection is tonight. The plan is for her to pick up her stuff and leave so we can both relax before it starts.
Miharu has a stern look on her face as she's about to leave...
BGM: Miharu
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Her proposition makes sense, so I nod. I'd been considering the possibilities of how Parca would settle things if neither of us could elect one another, myself. Stuff like the number of cards we have, how many cards we've acquired thus far- they could all become factors. It's entirely possible that Parca has the power to void an entire election too, considering her position. If the scenarios I've considered end up happening, the last thing we want is for it to be during the final round. We could trap ourselves.
In that case, today is the best day to try it out. Who knows, it might just cancel the entire ritual and force Parca to return to her own world. It's not guaranteed, but the possibility is there.
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Miharu leaves afterward, looking satisfied. Wait. I forgot to give her the mug with her name on it.
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I head up to my room with that thought in mind.
BGM: Rinka's Room
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Once in bed, I recall everything that's happened since yesterday. I went on my first date to the aquarium. And we went to the theme park today. It's been a special weekend, to say the least. The idea that I'll have more experiences down the line makes me smile.
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It's only been two days since we started dating. I wonder what else we'll do from here on out.
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Lethe sneaks into my room. I invite it to bed since I'm in a good mood, but it brushes me off. It turns around and makes its way back out of the room, but not before stopping to look back at me.
It keeps its eyes locked on me for quite a while.
...
BGM: The Sacred Large Hall
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07/15 (SUN), Midnight
Of the twelve platforms present in the Court of Fate, only two remain that participants are actually standing on. Miharu's and my own. A strange sense of sadness pervades the endless dreamscape. As usual, Parca's voice cuts straight through those sensations.
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Neither of us react to her comment, causing her to press on.
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This round of Divine Selection starts the same as it does in Bad End 4, including the conversation about previous Divine Selection rituals and Rinka electing Miharu initially. The two rise to the Upper Stratum and Parca takes this opportunity to comment on Rinka serving as her next vessel, before Miharu prompts Parca to allow the election to begin...
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Miharu's on the same page as me. Parca pouts for a moment, but she quickly adopts a grin instead.
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BGM: Fated Selection
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I nod and flip open my card book. Picking out the three cards I need is an easy task.
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I speed right through the election this time. Once I finish, Miharu opens her card book. I can't see too well thanks to the light, but I assume she's getting her cards ready as well.
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BGM: Silence
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A cold chill runs down my spine. I have no idea what she's implying. Well, I mean, I do. I'm just trying to convince myself otherwise.
There's no way I can accept it.
There's no way.
BGM: Two Crossing Paths -S/I V/S-
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My mind's a mess from this sudden change of events. I can feel my emotions going wild.
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She closes her card book. A sign that my plea has fallen on deaf ears. There is no pain or anguish in her expression. She offers only a sincere, beautiful smile.
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The cards I chose begin to move, as if my will has no further say in the matter. I try to reach out and snatch them back to no avail.
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My three cards make their way to the center of the Court of Fate. Once there, light pours forth from them.
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My overflowing emotions cause me to collapse onto my knees. There's no way for me to stop it. Miharu's going to die again and there's nothing I can do about it.
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I can't even see her through the light anymore.
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Miharu's voice fades as she speaks.
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My mind grows cloudy following that.
Miharu's final moments are the same here as they are in Bad End 4. The events immediately following her election, as well, are the same- Parca shows her delight in Rinka being the one to become her vessel, and explains how Divine Selection works- that it seams multiple timelines together temporarily to justify the participants still being alive despite their deaths already having occurred. The Court of Fate begins to break apart as Parca slowly walks towards Rinka...
BGM: Do You Understand?
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Parca extends her hand out to me. Her palm is so tiny, her arm so slender. They seem like they'll snap just by touching me. I extend my own hand in response. Parca doesn't take mine in hers, though. Her hand goes straight toward my chest. After making contact, it sinks into my body. In this moment, I witness her merging with my own body. The light surrounding her envelops me.
BGM: Sinking in Flames
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Upon closing my eyes, I see a number of dreams. I'm not sure if I'm remembering them, or if the light is responsible.
Chan and Ro, who were eliminated without me ever knowing anything about them... I'm sure they had their own desires in the face of the brief hope they were given.
Keiko, who entrusted her feelings for her child to me. I'm sure she and her husband shared those feelings, hence why a letter was never needed in the first place when naming it.
I'm so sorry, Sonya. You wished for our happiness from the bottom of your heart, but I'm the only one who survived. I promise I'll show Passazhir more of the world for your sake, at least.
Shigetsugu, who loved Yu as if he were his own grandson. Our time together was brief, and though I never really came to like him, I can't say I hated him. He had his own convictions in all this, not to mention the things he wanted Yu to learn.
As for Yu, I can never forgive him for killing Naomi. The despair he went through is something I can't let myself forget, though. It represents the tragedies happening all across the world. His regret represented his desire to live a normal, simple life. Similar to my own, yet with a much heavier weight to it. He simply wanted that which he never had. So I can't hate him, despite what he did.
Odette, whose strength never ceased to amaze me. She had accepted her fate, I'm certain. Death is simply the end result of life, after all. Her resolve to not look back is what allowed her to leave on her own terms.
I can't condemn Scale for his attachment to life. That's why my only option was to eliminate him by my own will. I may not have been able to condemn him, but I could never see eye-to-eye with him.
I only ever met Federico in the real world once, but his realization that he had been victorious left him shivering with joy. I'm not too sure about his life and how it played out, but I have no doubt that to him, it was worth it in the end.
Alan, whose sister I resembled. His way of life was something I could never accomplish. That was precisely why I thought he was incredible.
And Miharu, who taught me more about who I was than anyone else. I don't know much about being in love, but her confession was no doubt a turning point for me. One so major, it changed my entire outlook on how to live.
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Grief overwhelms me once more now that Parca's done with her explanation. This is different from what happened with Naomi. Miharu won't come back, no matter what I do. I know that I'm going to feel even worse than I do now when I wake up in the real world. Even so, I need to live on. I'll live my life to its absolute fullest.
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A voice rings out. An incredibly annoying voice, at that.
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The voice gradually becomes more distant. But I already know.
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I know, because-
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I finally grasp my own consciousness. Parca's speech is a bit fuzzy, but I can more or less understand her. This has to be a different process from what she did with Miharu.
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If I had to describe what I'm experiencing right now, I'd liken it to having my insides thrown in a blender. The foreign object whirring around within me makes me want to throw up. If my understanding is correct then she has one thing in mind. She wants to take control of my body. That theory soon becomes conviction.
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She really is trying to take control of me. But I have no special powers of my own to speak of. There's nothing I can do to stop her. Even so, I can't sit by and let someone wrest my own body from me. Not even Miharu was robbed of this.
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I know my mind is being taken over and yet I'm able to remain defiant. It doesn't change anything, though. Parca's will eventually overtakes my own.